Matt Brauning lives with his wife Lola and son Valiant in Orange County, California. His life is incredibly full and active and he enjoys it that way. He loves to write, climb mountains and ride his motorcycle between speaking engagements and therapy sessions.
Matt is an MNLP, MTD, MH.t is a Master Trainer of NLP, a Master Trainer of Time DynamicsTM and a certified Master NLP Life Coach. He is an entrepreneur, international best-selling author of Total Freedom From Addictions. He has had thousands attend his seminars around the world, as people try to gain a competitive advantage in business, finances, relationships, career and health. Matt founded Evolution Seminars, which uses cutting edge technology like NLP and Time Dynamics to help people achieve success in all areas of their lives.
Using NLP (neuro-linguistic programming), hypnosis, time dynamics and other methods, Matt works with people to help them be free from addictions, so that they can survive AND thrive in ANY economy. He shows people how to stop doing things they really don’t want to do, and helps them start doing the things they DO want to do.
Join us on this Episode to hear Matt explain what NLP really is and how it can profoundly impact your life, the way you view things and how he helps give people all around the world a competitive advantage to succeed – in business, health, relationships and more.
In This Episode
1 – It’s Raining Men; He Learned From Tony Robbins; Borrowed The Trailer & The Driveway2 – What Is NLP? A Mindset & A Process With Physiological Patterns3 – Will Power Resides In The Conscious; Behavior: Start. Stop. Change4 – Holding Dumbbells; Barcodes In Your Brain; NLP Is Not Magic
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Steve: Alright. It’s another edition here of Reinvention Radio. I’m your host, Steve Olsher. I’m super excited today. We’ve got another full house, which is awesome. I love it when we have an in-studio guest. When we have an in-studio guest…
Mary: It’s more fun.
Steve: …it’s definitely more fun. Not that we don’t love our call-ins, don’t get me wrong but Jesus if you’re in LA, I love you Christina, it was a great show, but come on, just drive down from LA. Really, it’s not that far.
Mary: Well, she was a great interview. Sometimes…
Steve: She was a great interview. If she was in person she would have been even better.
Mary: Because they miss seeing us goofballs in person with our facial expressions and the whole dynamo.
Steve: Right. And you two can look… So, we’ve got Matt Brauning in the house right now. So, welcome, Matt, how you doing man?
Matt: Really good. Thanks for having me on, Steve.
Mary: Did you drive down?
Matt: I did.
Steve: He did.
Mary: How was it?
Steve: In the rain.
Matt: It was amazing. Only a few extra accidents than I expected. Not a big deal.
Steve: Alright. So, if you had to choose one song about rain that you were singing over and over again, what would be your rain song?
Matt: My rain song. Raining Men probably I guess comes to mind.
Steve: Ooh, It’s Raining Men. Alleluia. Oh, man.
Matt: That’s the only song I could ever come up with.
Mary: Good choice, Matt.
Mary: Purple Rain.
Steve: Oh, there’s a good rain song. Purple Rain. I like that. Rich, what was the song you were singing…
Rich: Oh, from the dream?
Rich: [Singing] Rainy days and Mondays, always gets me down.
Steve: See, Rich is always like our in-house entertaining for singing. So, whenever we have a song we just push it over… Mary, you can sing. Mary’s got a really good singing voice. You don’t sing nearly enough for us. We’re going to have to get you to sing.
Matt: That’s right.
Mary: I’m not going to pull off Prince or whatever his name is now.
Steve: I think it’s just a symbol now or did he go back to…
Matt: Not very good for radio I don’t think.
Steve: The symbol? Trying to…
Mary: Our guest is…
Steve: Our guest is. Symbol dude thingy. Speaking of which. What ever happened to that guy? My God, he just f*cked enough women, he decided that I’m done with my life…
Steve: What? It’s true. I mean, my God! Like the ‘70s, ‘80s, ‘90s, like the guy is – actually a true story. He had a concert in Chicago and my best friend’s wife is a singer and an aspiring wino, what to be a pop-singer, the whole nine, and they got tickets to see Prince – huge Prince fan, got tickets to see Prince, got passes to the after party at – this is kind of dating myself but this was back when the China Club was around. Do they have an LA China Club – do you…
Mary: Was that in the ‘80s?
Matt: Is that an app or something.
Steve: [Laughing] So, there was a – so the club was called the China Club. The big deal back then, big space, Prince had this whole section of the club for himself, saw my friend’s wife and was like hey, come on in, come and talk…
Steve: Right. And just, can I buy you a drink. But, anyway, long story short, like I sh*t you not, he was completely all over her with him, my friend right there and, of course, he kind of stepped in – my friend, and was kind of like giving him the eye like I don’t care who you are little man, you’re going to get… Because he’s a little man…
Mary: Little man?
Steve: He’s a little man. I don’t know who you think you are, little man… By the way, if you want to hear something like really, really funny, there’s a documentary called Little Man where this guy literally took recordings of his neighbors for years and there were two… Did you ever hear this, Rich?
Rich: No. But it sounds funny.
Steve: Two roommates and they would just yell at each other – two guys, and I will kill you little man and it’s just like for years he’s got all of these recordings. Anyway… But…
Mary: That was a weird side.
Steve: But true Prince story. He was a little bit of a womanizer.
Mary: He’s a Minnesotan – 1st Avenue.
Steve: And is your state proud or not proud…
Mary: At the time I think we were.
Steve: Yeah. And now not so much.
Steve: It’s like, Bill Cosby – the home of Bill Cosby. Now they’re like ooh sh*t!
Steve: I told you about my favorite Bill Cosby meme, right?
Steve: Do you remember my Bill Cosby meme? Oh, God, did I share this with you?
Steve: My favorite Bill Cosby – remember this one.
Rich: You did. You told us, Mary.
Mary: I don’t listen to half of what he says, so…
Steve: That’s true. My favorite Bill Cosby meme ever is it’s like he’s got that smiley face, that big, huge smiling grin with that box of Jell-O pudding and it says – basically it’s that picture at the top it says I love Puddin, and at the bottom it says Puttin’ my dick where it doesn’t belong.
Steve: Sorry, Matt. You actually had people who you had people tune into this. I saw the email go out, so thank you for that.
Matt: Oh, it’s great. Don’t worry.
Mary: You might want to…
Rich: What have I tuned into?
Steve: We just lost… So, here’s a great thing. Did you listen to an episode of Reinvention Radio before you committed to this?
Matt: I remember you saying something about Howard Stern meets personal development and I was like, alright…
Steve: How bad could it be?
Matt: How bad could it be?
Steve: How bad could it be? It’s Steve, I know you man. Let’s just go hang out. It’s like – Uber. Maybe I can get an Uber and it will take me an hour and a half to get home now.
Mary: I hope the monitor’s off in the green room.
Steve: Pirates of the Caribbean, my 9-year-old is in the other room right now watching Pirates of the Caribbean. I turned that volume up so damn loud. It’s like every explosion. You know like how we’ve been sitting here wondering what that noise is feeling the… Every explosion we can hear all the way here in the studio. That’s how loud it is in there.
Mary: So, he can’t hear you.
Steve: So he can’t hear me. That’s pure strategy. So, Matt Brauning in the house. Welcome, my man. Welcome. Welcome.
Matt: Thank you. Can’t wait to get into it.
Mary: You’re already too far deep into it now.
Steve: So, for those who don’t know you, give us some Matt Brauning story. Like, what are you doing? Obviously, you’re into a whole bunch of different things and even reading your bio, I thought I knew you but clearly I don’t know very much about you. Actually, I was like, man I’m glad I read this – now I feel like I know you a lot more.
Rich: You read?
Steve: Occasionally. It’s on audio book. Even like the things that I get sent by email. I get my email read to me there…
Mary: Do you really?
Steve: Yeah, I do.
Rich: That’s really good.
Steve: So, Matt Brauning, the story. I want it.
Matt: Okay. So, first before we start that you still owe me a motorcycle ride…
Steve: I do.
Matt: We had planned this thing for like…
Steve: And you owe me a mustache ride.
Matt: Let’s see about that…
Rich: [Singing] It’s Raining Men…
Matt: Go ahead, the Howard Stern’s story… Go ahead and turn your speaker down to the ground and go ahead and sit on that. So, that’s not going to happen.
Steve: That’s not going to happen.
Matt: So, we planned this for like two months and then we had like one day that both of our schedules finally lined up. I’m in Orange County, you’re in San Diego – an hour away, not a big deal, but then it rains that day.
Steve: It does, the one day.
Matt: God shined down on us and said you guys are not riding.
Steve: Did you ride down or did you drive down?
Matt: Oh, I drove down.
Mary: Yeah. Motorcycle in the rain from Orange County.
Steve: They’re die-hard motorcycle folks. They don’t care.
Matt: Oh, it’s unbelievable!
Steve: I had buddies in Chicago who…
Matt: Put on raingear.
Steve: …would ride when it was 20 degrees. I’m not that die-hard. F*ck it! I’m just going to take – I’ll just drive. It’s not that big of a deal. I don’t need to get frostbite today. You’re driving, the wind chill’s below 0. So, yes, we have a motorcycle date.
Steve: We’ll get to that.
Matt: Coming up.
Steve: So, now. That’s off the table. So, we’ve got that down. Now, give us the Matt Brauning thing for those who don’t know you.
Matt: So, the real quick. Matt Brauning thing is I’ve been teaching personal development, which is basically how to make yourself awesome for the last decade. And I learned from one of the best, Tony Robbins, so I saw him in 2002 – the guy with the big teeth, big hands, huge head – if you haven’t seen him before, huge head. Everyone knows Tony. I say that endearing. I love him, and after learning all the patterns behind why people do what they do eventually I just realized I’ve got to get out of this real estate industry I’ve been in for years, and nothing wrong with that, right? It was great but I just was feeling like every day, I just don’t love this anymore. I just don’t care about it anymore.
Steve: Yeah. Now, you had done really well for a while in real estate, right?
Matt: Yeah. I made my first million by 25 through investing and also had three different businesses doing real estate and sales and then we also did mortgages, of course, and then also financial investments and trusts and all sorts of things like that. I just kind of started getting out there. I had the right mentors early on and just figured out that side of things, but really quickly it got really boring which sounds weird, but it was like, oh no poor me, all this money, but… It sounds like such a dumb story on one side, but I think if someone’s been to the top… And you’ve been so successful in so many different ways you know, Steve, like you start getting somewhere and you realize gosh like now that I don’t have to worry about eating or putting gas in my car or those types of things…
Matt: …then you start having the other questions, which is…
Steve: That’s when money doesn’t matter. It’s like, yeah…
Matt: It’s weird, right?
Steve: It’s like – nobody needs money. Of course you don’t need money, you have money. It’s like – those are the people who have that conversation. It’s always kind of like money isn’t important while you get in your Ferrari and drive away, it’s like, come one!
Matt: Easy for you to say.
Steve: Right. Easy for you to say. But it wasn’t all like – flowery sunshine and happily ever after, you actually had a setback or two, yeah?
Matt: So, here’s the funny thing. Everything’s perfect and anyone who’s like – I’m guessing you probably have a few people listening who are in to personal development or have attended educational seminars or that sort of thing, the coaching industry – and everyone seems to have this trailer park story, right? And I kind of do except for I wasn’t in a park. I was in a friend’s driveway, in his trailer living there for six months.
Steve: You had to borrow the trailer for the trailer park story. [Laugh]
Rich: In someone else’s driveway.
Matt: Unfortunately, that is a true story.
Steve: It’s a borrowed trailer in a borrowed driveway for the trailer story.
Matt: But that’s where my story went. I literally was on top of the financial world as far as I was concerned. I know people who were way better off than I was, but I had all my needs taken care of and I started diving into what did I really want to do with my life and I was like, I’m going to be a Coach. It’s going to be amazing! I saw Tony Robbins on stage. I’ll do what he does. So, he has 6,000 people. I put on my first seminar, massive success. There were six people.
Matt: Yeah, they were my parents.
Steve: It had a six in it, so that’s a step in the right direction.
Matt: Missing zeros, yeah.
Steve: So, two were your parents, nice.
Matt: Right. And that’s true, that’s what happened. And at the end I was like gosh I don’t know how to do this as a living but I sure like doing it, so for the next two years I basically sacrificed everything and said I’m just going to follow this dream and man I spent a lot of money, putting on a lot of seminars and doing Coaching and really didn’t make any money there, and two years later I found myself living in my buddy’s trailer and I had – I didn’t blow through all my money but it was gone.
Matt: Because I wasn’t working real estate any more. I let houses go that I shouldn’t have and I won’t blame the economy – this is nearly 10 years ago. I just decided, I don’t care about the whole life. I just want to change lives. I want to care about people. And after about two years and I finally catch a break and realize how to bring those worlds together, how to actually say I don’t need to run away from business. Does that make sense? I know a lot of coaching type people will run away from business and they run towards trying to help everyone. And what I realized is this is a business like any other business not matter what you’re doing, except I get to go on stage and speak instead of selling tires.
Steve: Very cool, man. So, let’s do this. Let’s include a break here on Reinvention Radio. If you want to join the conversation, the phone number is 866-977-2346, hit #1. We’ll be right back with Matt Brauning here on Reinvention Radio right after this.
Steve: How are you, Mary?
Mary: Doing great.
Steve: You are. And I was thinking about this – and Rich Otey, and White Wade, and Kelly and the whole crew is hanging out as well. I was thinking about – now that we’ve got Matt in studio. We’ve got Matt Brauning in the studio today. I was looking at your eyes and I was looking at Matt’s eyes and I was thinking like you two could just gaze at each other’s baby blues, just…
Mary: Mine are hazel.
Steve: You guys have the nicest eyes. That’s why I like having people in the studio. When you’re not here you know who sits in that chair?
Mary: That’s not working.
Steve: That’s not working at all.
Rich: [Singing] It’s raining men…
Steve: And then there’s Rich who I like looking at, but you guys got this baby blue thing going on and it’s like – I love it. Very nice. Let’s do this. Because you have got a pretty interesting basis for the work that you do which is a lot of what you teach obviously is around communication and business and so on, but it really is built from the foundation of NLP, right?
Steve: Was Tony Robbins the first one to introduce you to the whole concept of NLP or were you familiar with it before you went to that event in 2002, you said?
Matt: That is correct. He was the first time I got introduced to it. It’s Neuro-Linguistic Programming, NLP. It’s been around since the early ‘70s and Tony was one of the first trainers in there. Not one of the first, but the first, you know, 5-10 years. In the last ‘70s, early ‘80s he really started popularizing it with the seminars. So, I never heard of it before and I didn’t know what he was doing, but when I saw him on stage like reprogramming people and changing their behaviors and thought patterns and stuff I looked up, like what was he doing? And it turned out it was this NLP stuff, so I had to go get trained.
Steve: So, this is a very specific process. So, when he works with people, when you work with people, when other NLP practitioners work with people, you are taking them through a specific kind of line of communication, a line of thinking – what does that look like? Like, in action, what does an NLP look like and what can it do? What can the benefits of NLP be… Talk about some of the results.
Matt: Awesome. So, first let me give you a quick little metaphor. Like, imagine NLP is not so much a process but it’s more like a recipe box. So you have this huge, like your old grandmother used to have like this huge Betty Crocker recipe box that had all the different things. So, if you want to make a pie versus you want to mix a drink, two totally different results…
Steve: And if you want to mix a drink, you know where you go, right?
Matt: Steve Olsher’s house.
Steve: Liquor.com. Exactly.
Matt: A plug. So, you have these different recipes. So, essentially what NLP really is is saying what’s the result that you want to get? And I don’t care if you want to be a great parent, you want to learn how to snowboard 10 times faster than you normally would, or you want to start a business, or you want to learn how to public speak… I mean, literally any result you want, NLP is a process of saying – How do I get a recipe for this so I can do it faster, easier, and with better results. That’s really what it comes down to. It’s a mindset in the process.
Mary: Can you explain… Okay, Neuro-Linguistic Programming. So, what would be one of the recipe cards?
Matt: I know, right?
Mary: So, pick something, Steve.
Steve: Okay. So, I want to be – I want to lose 10 lbs.
Matt: You want to lose 10 lbs.
Steve: Yeah. So, like, there are people out there that feel like they’ve got 10 lbs. too much. I’ve tried everything. I go to the gym, I eat good, I just can’t get rid of that 10 lbs.
Mary: Eat potato chips during the radio show.
Steve: Oh, is that a problem? I’m not supposed to. Thank you, by the way to our sponsor Lay’s® Potato Chips for the Sour Cream and Onion, and today we have Salt and Vinegar, so thank you for that.
Matt: They do crunch too much, yeah.
Steve: Alright. So, for somebody who wants to lose 10 lbs., is that a decent example? Is that…
Matt: It’s a great example.
Steve: NLP could be used for that. Okay. So, what do you do?
Matt: Let me give you an example about that. So, there’s external and internal strategies. So, meaning like you know what external strategies to do. External meaning what do you eat, how do you move your body, do you get up in the morning, do you exercise, do you stretch, do you eat at McDonald’s or do you go to have salads. I don’t know anybody who thinks that a quarter pounder with cheese with a diet Coke is health food, right? I just don’t think that’s the case. So, we don’t know externally what to do.
Steve: Wait! It’s not?
Mary: And beer is food.
Steve: It’s got hops in it. Isn’t that like a food something or another?
Matt: It’s vegetarian too if you think about it.
Steve: It is a vegetarian meal.
Mary: We understand the externals.
Mary: It’s the internal that gets us…
Steve: The diet Coke doesn’t set off the quart… That doesn’t balance the quarter pounder if you have a diet Coke?
Mary: Did you know they’re doing labeling – this is a side thing…
Steve: You’re becoming Steve Olsher.
Mary: …put labels right on food products that show you someone biking, someone running, and someone swimming and telling you how long you’d have to do one or all of those activities to burn off that Big Mac…
Matt: That’s a great idea.
Steve: I love that idea.
Matt: It’s not going to change anything, but it’s a great idea.
Matt: So, let me tell you this.
Steve: Yeah, please – external/internal.
Matt: You’re eating… Smoking’s a great example, right? Like, whatever you think about smoking. But I don’t know anyone who thinks…
Steve: Did you bring some? I’m ready.
Matt: That’s not what we’re talking about…
Mary: We will get to that recipe card at some point.
Steve: Where? Where? Oh, recipe card, yes.
Matt: But I don’t know anyone who thinks smoking is a healthy thing, right? But we try to tell people hey you know those things will kill you, that’s a bad thing to do.
Matt: You never told that to someone and have them come to you and say – oh, my Gosh! Seriously? Thank you so much for telling me. I’m going to put that out right now. Right? So, we know what’s healthy, what’s not healthy. We know what’s good and not good in life for the most part. Where NLP comes in is all of the internal processes we do that help us decide what we’re going to do. So, we go through a few things. One is mental, one is emotional, and one is physiological. So, there’s three simple things we do. When I take NLP and I take a recipe card, let’s say the 10 lbs., I’m going to say okay…
Steve: Did you say mental, emotional and physiological?
Steve: Aren’t those are the same things?
Matt: You would think.
Steve: They are all the same things, no?
Matt: But completely and totally not.
Steve: Wow! Okay. Here we go. I’m ready.
Mary: And you’ve been married how long?
Steve: Mental, emotional, physiological.
Matt: Right. I know not mental, but let’s get to the next part.
Steve: Oh mental, damn it. Got to move beyond Step 1.
Matt: So, your mental is your thought patterns and I think that’s pretty straight forward. So, the things you say to yourself, the things you habitually think, and the things you automatically react by thinking. Right? Someone cuts you off, some people go oh, poor guy. Most people go you son of a… And they have this initial thought right away that brings them into positive/negative state and ultimately whatever state you’re in is going to determine how you behave. That’s the important thing.
Steve: Whenever anybody cuts me off in traffic, you know what I think? I think that guy has got to get home quick to beat off. That’s exactly what I think.
Mary: How do you even come up with this stuff?
Rich: [Singing] It’s raining men.
Matt: That’s the best thing ever.
Steve: He’s like, he’s got to get home. He’s got the picture on Twitter or whatever he’s looking at, he’s got to get home.
Matt: That thought process changes your state, doesn’t it? It probably makes you smile and laugh.
Steve: It does, exactly. Otherwise I would get out of the car and shoot him.
Rich: [Singing] It’s raining men.
Mary: Do you hear what I put up with?
Steve: I am so sorry.
Mary: Wherever two or more men are gathered, what age are they?
Steve: 12ish. Okay, so mental, got it.
Matt: So, mental’s your thought patterns. So, here’s the cool thing. You have conscious thought patterns that you think about – that you plan on thinking about, right? So, okay, I’m going to get up and pray today, so I’m going to pray. I’m going to get up and really try to make it my sales, I’m going to think to myself I could really do this and then that’s conscious. But the unconscious ones, the ones that happen automatically are way more important. NLP is dealing with different recipe cards or processes that would shift the automatic thoughts, the automatic emotional reactions, right? Driving in traffic is a great example. I was driving in traffic on the way down, there was a random car turned backwards in the carpool lane, right? I was like three minutes late coming in. I’m like there was an extra accident I didn’t think about. I thought I planned enough but didn’t. But as you’re driving along you’re in that kind of traffic, some people react automatically feeling like oh, man, I hope everything’s okay or just neutral but you could also have an automatic reaction, meaning before you even think about it that’s really really full emotion, right? Full of scared, full of anger, full of guilt – all sorts of different feelings. And then there are physiological patterns. Quick example. Like, if you want to get depressed, it’s not too hard to get depressed. In fact, there’s… [talkover]
Steve: Just hanging out with me. I suck the life out of every room I walk into.
Matt: I think it’s exact opposite with you, Steve. Because I get around you, I realize how great my life really is…
Steve: Oh, that’s so sweet.
Matt: When I see yours and I get really happy about that.
Steve: Aw, thank you for that. That’s awesome. That was a backhanded compliment. I’m crying over here.
Mary: It totally was.
Steve: I caught that!
Mary: Do you want me to pod him down?
Steve: No, yes… [Laugh] Okay. Great. So, I’m glad I make you feel better about your life. So, physiological…
Matt: I’m going to Walmart… So, physiological patterns. So, if I said everyone get depressed. You guys want to try it?
Matt: Just for a second. I want you to see what happens.
Steve: I didn’t even have to try.
Matt: No, this is going to be crazy. Just try it for a second. Just pretend or act as if you’re getting depressed right now. Everybody, go! Now, if you’re driving and listening to this, don’t do that right now – pay attention. But everyone get depressed and do whatever you have to do to feel like you’re at least starting to feel kind of bad. And you can’t see the radio station. What just happened is all three of you at once looked down. You all got this little grimace on your face. You all kind of hunched your shoulders, but your breathing changed a little bit too.
Mary: Slowed down.
Matt: Right. Now, if I said just real quick just think of something that’s really exciting. Go! Whatever it would take to be excited right now. At first it feels fake but then you realize it’s not really fake because if you smile and you feel good, it’s just feeling good.
Steve: God, you know what’s so sad? I had no problem being depressed. When he asked me about being excited, I couldn’t think of anything to get excited about. That is so sad. I want to go into a corner and cry.
Matt: You and every other human. I’ll do this exercise.
Steve: I don’t know what I’m going to be excited about.
Matt: We’ll do an exercise in a seminar. I say like write down on one side of the column of the page and the other, write down all the emotions you experienced last week that are happy, positive emotions. And they’re like oh right and they write these. And on the other side they write the negative ones. And people on average will have five times more negative emotions than they have positive emotions that they experience on a regular basis.
Steve: Yeah. Do you want to do a fun trick with that one?
Steve: In What Is Your What? I do sort of the same thing. So, like when you’re… What’s the opposite of anger? It’s like happy. What’s the opposite of depressed? It’s like excited. What’s the opposite of whatever it might be. So, you put that on the left side, put the other things on the right side and then you ask them the question, it’s like so… What does it cost you to live on the left side of the column where you’re… Let’s just do it this way – like, happy, excited… What does it cost you to live on the left side of the column? Well, the answer is well it doesn’t cost me anything to live on the left side of the column. What does it cost you to live on the right side of the column with the depressed and this, that and the other? And the answer is, it costs you everything. Right? And to get from one side to the other it’s really just a mental switch.
Matt: Well, this is what’s crazy – mental, emotional, physiological. And you can change it with any one of those three. So, I’ll tell people get depressed, and then look up, put a stupid grin on your face, and it sounds like a silly little childhood thing, but if you just do this [sound effect] and you have this big stupid grin with teeth, you cannot get – you can’t feel depression and it just doesn’t happen anymore. You can’t get there from here when you change one of the elements.
Steve: Yeah, it’s true. Tony Robbins did that in one of these things…
Steve: There was this girl was so depressed and he was like – tell yourself you’re depressed and – oh, I’m so depressed and she started cracking up in like no time.
Mary: We still have to figure out how to lose 10 lbs.
Steve: Right. I’m still fat. So, more on Reinvention Radio right after this.
Steve: Alrighty. Welcome back to another edition here of Reinvention Radio. Joined in the studio here by Matt Brauning. Yay! So glad you are here. Before the break we were talking about all sorts of interesting things on NLP in terms of how do I lose some weight? And so I’m still fat, so we need to get back to…
Mary: Read that recipe card.
Steve: We need to get to the right recipe card because you’re like Betty Crocker here. We’ve got to pull out the right thing. So, just out of curiosity, eating a bowl of raw cookie dough from that recipe box, that’s probably not going to further or forward my efforts to lose the 10 lbs. Correct?
Matt: Correct. That is reverse strategy. It’s not useful as much as you would think.
Steve: It’s not useful at all.
Mary: So, where’s the magic in the NLP?
Rich: Where’s the magic?
Mary: Right? Addressing something like weight loss. Because those things we work against ourselves. We can’t sustain that willpower.
Matt: Absolutely. That’s exactly the right word to use – so, willpower. The difference is willpower resides in the conscious mind. Now, there’s two parts of the mind, there’s a consciousness and a subconscious, right? Subconscious, the easiest way to think about it is it’s just the part of your mind you’re not aware of. That’s all it is. So, it’s the part of your mind that beats your heart 100,000 times a day, while you sleep, it thinks those thoughts you’re not thinking about. It pays attention to how your feet feel right now against your shoes. You probably weren’t noticing it until I mentioned it, right? The part of your mind that pays attention to your breathing, and all of a sudden you’re focused on your breathing again, now it’s conscious. A minute ago it was subconscious.
Matt: Easy as that. So, consciously you can have willpower. Humans can do anything, right? You can have willpower and say you know what? I’m just not going to eat this Twinkie today and you won’t. But over time willpower has to be focused on, and if you ever get distracted, overwhelmed or you get in some kind of a negative state, usually the first thing that goes out the door is willpower.
Steve: Are you spying on me by the way? Because what you just described is like my life right there. [Laugh]
Matt: Is your life… Welcome to your life.
Steve: Welcome to my life.
Matt: And everybody else’s. Humanity has not changed in thousands of years and every one of us is basically exactly the same in one way or another.
Steve: So, do you think it’s possible then to be like one of those happy people who just happy all the time. Is that a myth or is that like even possible?
Matt: If you think a lot you’re probably not going to be happy all the time. But I do believe if you control your circumstances, you can change. If you don’t want to be pissed off, sad, whatever, you could change it. What I found is most people who are like generally depressed, mad, angry, whatever a lot, if you really get down to it at some level they want to be there. There’s something they get from that and that’s a whole different recipe card and we can get to that too. But 10 lbs.
Steve: There’s a payoff.
Mary: Dude, I want to get to the 10 lbs.
Steve: 10 lbs. Yes. Sorry, go!
Matt: There’s what we call a secondary gain.
Matt: A positive benefit for a negative behavior.
Steve: Nice. The story of my life would be the subtitle right there in my book. You podded me down?
Matt: Subtitle for Liquor.com.
Steve: Alright, 10 lbs.
Matt: So, 10 lbs. Just look at this. Here’s what I want you to think about, right, if you’re listening to this and for all three of you. If you have whatever, 10 lbs. or whatever it is, think of it like this. What is one behavior that you know if you started doing this more or doing this at all you know you will make a significant difference and significant change to your body? Pick one behavior. Pick it, literally.
Mary: Say something.
Matt: Like, say something out loud.
Steve: Speak! Alright, Rich you go first. Yours is going to be better than mine. I’m going to cheat.
Rich: I was going to say change our sponsor from Lay’s®.
Steve: So, stop the 64 oz. bag of…
Mary: So, like, lift weights.
Matt: Lift weights, okay, good. So, you need to lift weights and right now you’re either not or you’re not doing it enough. Fair?
Matt: Rich, you need to stop eating Lay’s®.
Steve: And I think for me I think I really need to stop eating those what is it – it’s that tube, it’s a tube of the Tollhouse raw cookie dough. I can’t help myself.
Matt: You weren’t kidding.
Steve: No, oh my God…
Mary: You really do do that?
Rich: I’m glad you didn’t go to the Shaniqua story.
Steve: Oh, man, the Shaniqua story, no. This was the 100th episode on that one.
Matt: Do you just hold it like a big sausage, like take a big bite out of it?
Steve: Literally, just get like a spoon – I don’t even like – I just cut off the top and I just dig down with the spoon until it gets all over your hands…
Mary: You could get e coli.
Steve: No, you can’t. I am living proof you cannot get e coli.
Matt: Unbelievable. There are raw eggs in there. Yet…
Steve: Okay, so I’ve got to stop eating the raw cookie dough, got it!
Matt: Everyone has a behavior to alter or to start, stop, or change essentially, right?
Matt: Okay. So, there’s a couple of ways to look at it. So, what we want to do is find an unconscious pattern and change the trigger to an unconscious pattern. Okay? There’s a trigger that starts that. So, at some point Steve is not eating raw cookie dough. Like, right now you’re not eating it, right?
Steve: I don’t know…
Matt: No, you’re not. But at some point…
Matt: …you’ll get home and you’ll be like doing something not thinking about raw cookie dough. And then minutes go by and all of a sudden you find yourself thinking about it.
Steve: I haven’t had raw cookie dough for about six minutes, and then that’s…
Matt: And then an image pops in your head or you say a thought to yourself or you see something or you get a certain feeling in your body. Does that make sense? So, one of those things, you see, hear or feel something around the environment.
Matt: That’s what we call the trigger.
Steve: I see the refrigerator…
Matt: That’s probably it.
Steve: No, that’s it, that’s a start, that’s all I need.
Matt: So, you’re probably walking around your living room, everything’s fine, playing with your kids, whatever, talking with your wife, and all of a sudden you look and you see the refrigerator and then that triggers… What’s the very next thing that happens once you see the refrigerator?
Steve: I get a big smile.
Steve: I’m like oooh. I know what’s behind that door… Door #1.
Steve: That’s raw cookie dough.
Matt: So, now what happens is that refrigerator door triggers what we call a strategy NLP. So, back to Mary’s question about one of the recipe cards, right?
Matt: There’s a recipe card called Strategies. A Strategy is what you’re doing internally when you’re not thinking about it whenever you do what you do.
Matt: I’ll say that one more time. So, a Strategy is what you do internally when you’re not thinking about whatever it is that you do. So, Steve’s not thinking about what he does when he is about to eat cookie dough. He just does it, right?
Steve: It’s true.
Matt: But it’s everybody, right? All of us have that thing. Most people don’t think about what they’re doing when they decided to snooze alarm 1600 times each morning when they sleep in. They’re not thinking, oh, did I make a picture in my head of myself sleeping and then did I say to myself oh, man, I don’t want to go to work and then did I get a negative feeling in my gut and how big was the feeling? No one goes through that process. They just hit the snooze and go back to bed.
Matt: Or they see the frig, get a smile and then go eat cookie dough, right?
Matt: So, here’s a question for you. Think about what would it do for you if you legitimately not only stopped eating cookie dough but you didn’t want to anymore? You were just like – eh, I can take it or leave it and I just don’t care about it.
Rich: That’s when he lays down in the fetal position…
Steve: [Laugh] on the bathroom floor.
Rich: …on the bathroom floor.
Matt: That’s what would happen right now if you quit and you didn’t change your internal state, right?
Steve: I could see that.
Matt: And this is what people give… I’ve done so many of these things. We did this exercise, it’s called Mapping Across. Go look it up on YouTube.
Steve: Mapping Across?
Matt: Mapping Across, NLP Technique. Search my name, Matt Brauning, and you’ll probably see one of our…
Steve: Mapping Across, like the Passion of the Christ or are we talking about across one word?
Mary: Like a map.
Matt: Yep. Mapping Across something, right?
Steve: Got it. Okay.
Mary: Like, the path.
Steve: I was totally picturing like Mel Gibson and the Passion of Christ. Totally different thing.
Matt: Definitely a different technique.
Mary: See, he just goes!
Steve: Got it, sorry.
Matt: Severely different technique.
Steve: There’s no helping you! You will be fat. You’re never losing the 10 lbs.
Matt: You could keep it if you want. I know it’s comfy… You fill out your shirt. It’s really good.
Steve: There’s Steve.
Matt: Yeah. So, check that out. When you get to your computer, go to YouTube and look up Mapping Across NLP Technique and what you’ll see is like – we do this with junk food a lot. It’s become a famous NLP technique. It is a great example, a great recipe card for taking something that you like and feeling internally that you just don’t like it anymore. I’ve done it with donuts with people, with Skittles, with Snicker bars, with Twix bars…
Matt: …with all sorts of things. I did it reversed on myself to like brussel sprouts. I hated brussel sprouts and would throw up in my mouth every time I saw them.
Matt: If I smelled them – not even a chance. You’d look at my face and I would lose color, like physiologically.
Steve: Wait. So, is that where the hypnotism and all that sort of…
Matt: That’s all NLP.
Steve: That’s all NLP.
Matt: So, NLP people did study hypnotists early on. One of the people with Dr. Milton Erickson who would do like hypnosis sessions really he was just a storyteller. He would tell stories and talk to unconscious minds essentially, right? So, in the NLP field we’re doing the same thing. I’m saying, man, how do you look at a brussel sprout and decide it’s disgusting? How do you look at an oyster? Who loves oysters?
Mary: Not me.
Steve: I learned to like them. I hated them and now I like them.
Matt: You hated them, now you like them. Mary, you hate them. Richard?
Rich: I like them.
Matt: You like them, right? They’re the same damn oysters. What makes one… Like, the same exact oyster, what makes one person love them, one person hate them?
Rich: The horseradish.
Steve: Right. Totally. And the Tabasco.
Matt: I find Sake is probably the best part of the oyster. Isn’t that how you eat oysters?
Rich: I prefer Vodka.
Matt: They’re the same oyster but one person loves them, one person hates them. They’re the same exact oyster, the same taste buds. We all have the same seven taste buds in our mouths – seven major tastes, but you interpret that map as disgusting, you interpret that map as amazing. What makes us do that? It’s the map we have in our brains. So, in the NLP field we’re basically discovering the map.
Steve: Is that like synapse – like the way they fire off for one person and – I don’t know what I’m talking about. I just like that word.
Mary: That’s a good word.
Steve: For a hundred episodes…
Matt: He sounded really smart.
Steve: …I’ve been trying to figure out how to get the word synapse and finally in the 102nd episode I got the word in.
Matt: …synaptic gap. The hardest word to say. I can never say it. The synaptic gap.
Steve: Oh, synaptic gap. There you go. So, yes, 10 lbs.
Matt: So, you have a map in your brain of everything – this is probably the best way to describe it, the map in your brain of everything whether it’s food, what you like and what you dislike. Getting up at 6 A.M., what does that feel like to different people?
Matt: One person feels painful, one person feels like, man that’s late! I should be up at 4:30. Right? So, Mary’s like 6 o’clock – nah that’s lazy. Steve’s like 6 o’clock, I just went to bed.
Matt: But when you think about the time 6 A.M. you get a feeling inside, right? So, that’s the same for everything. So, here’s what you need to change. There’s a map of how you feel about times of day, about foods you eat, even about exercise like going to the gym, lifting weights for Mary, right? So, what we need to do is… We have one map, and then we can actually take a different map, right? There’s a whole strategy process we’re obviously not going to get into on the radio, but there’s a whole process… I can do it for you in a second, but to describe it and teach it it would take a good couple of hours probably.
Matt: But, like, we could take one map of why you love something, like sleeping in or – what do you do instead of lifting weights, Mary?
Mary: Just walk.
Matt: Walk, right?
Matt: So you know that if you lift weights it will be better. So, do you like walking?
Matt: Do you enjoy it?
Matt: Walk inside or outside?
Mary: Outside, by the beach.
Matt: Do you walk on your own or with people?
Mary: With my boyfriend.
Matt: With your boyfriend? That’s fun. Do you hold hands or do you walk side by side?
Steve: Ooooh… Mary has a boyfriend…
Mary: No, we’re exercising.
Matt: Right. So, you’ve got the sweatbands and you’re ready to go with your iPod.
Matt: Do you listen to music or do you talk to each other?
Mary: Talk to each other.
Matt: Nice, so that’s why you love it.
Matt: Yeah, absolutely. Well, you’re a woman. It’s not a bad thing to talk, right?
Mary: I’m very shy.
Steve: You’re blushing. Mary’s blushing.
Mary: I’m very shy.
Matt: I know, very shy. But with a boyfriend…
Steve: Alright, so we’ll have to take a little break here and we’ll continue with Mary and her blushing [Laugh]…
Mary: You do this to me all the time.
Steve: But we are literally – we are seconds away from revealing the secret to losing…
Mary and Steve: …10 lbs.!
Steve: Here on Reinvention Radio right after this.
Steve: Welcome back here to another edition of Reinvention Radio. Matt Brauning in the house along with Mary Goulet, Rich Otey, and I am Steve Olsher. Now, this is where it gets really interesting because I’m talking about NLP and when I hear that music I get right back in the vibe. I’m like, no matter what I’m doing, as soon as I hear that music, I’m like, okay, Reinvention Radio time. It’s like…
Matt: And that’s called an anchor.
Steve: That’s an anchor right there.
Matt: It’s another recipe.
Steve: So, an anchor, not like someone you’re in a relationship with who you don’t like – a different type of anchor.
Matt: Well, you could be anchored to somebody you didn’t like, right? You hear a song on the radio when you were breaking up and then 10 years later you drive down, you hear that, you want to cry, right Steve?
Steve: Yeah. Still. You have a camera in my car.
Steve: And I intentionally just played that one radio station that plays like all the love songs, and just cry everywhere I go.
Matt: That’s how it works though…
Mary: That’s funny.
Steve: You can change the channel. I’m like, no I want to cry. Alright, so 10 lbs. [Laugh]
Mary: Yeah, geez Louise.
Rich: We’re going to do it this episode.
Mary: Yeah, the weights.
Matt: Alright, so you want to hear it?
Matt: Okay, so here’s what we’re going to do.
Steve: Here goes!
Matt: So, we’re talking about maps, right? So, you have an unconscious map in your mind of the thing that you love to do, and you also have a map or a strategy that you’re not conscious of the things you don’t like to do. So, we’re going to take Mary and take you from walking with your boyfriend and talking and connecting and having a nice time and you love that and you feel good when you do that, right?
Matt: Okay. And when you think about lifting weights, what kind of picture do you get in your head?
Mary: [Deep breath] That it’s going to be hard…
Matt: She already took a big breath and sighed and she sat back an inch, I can see her right now. Our physiology gives us away. It’s really true, right?
Mary: Yeah, it is.
Matt: It’s going to be horrible. What kind of picture do you get in your head when you think about lifting weights?
Mary: Let’s see. Struggle…
Matt: What does the picture look like when you make a picture of lifting weights.
Mary: Well, me standing there picking up some dumbbells, not these two guys.
Rich: Ha ha ha ha…
Matt: So, you’re holding dumbbells, you’re holding two guys, okay, that’s terrible, right?
Mary: Yeah, and then just having to… It seems like such a long time that you have to slowly lift and it gets boring and then…
Matt: Oh, my gosh. Okay, do you want to switch it real quick?
Matt: Okay. So, here’s what we’re going to do. So, have you ever bought a product with like on the back of it there’s a barcode, right?
Matt: Okay. So, when you scan the barcode what pops up? All the information, all the price, all that kind of stuff. And what happens is there’s a barcode in our brains that tells us how to feel about everything that we do. So, you have a barcode imagine for how you can feel about lifting weights, and you have a barcode for how you feel about going for a walk with your boyfriend.
Matt: Different barcodes. You scan the first one – boop! Ewww. You scan the second one – boop! Oh, that sounds really great, I want to do that. So, if we swap the bar… We don’t actually swap them. Don’t worry. You’re not going to hate walking with… It doesn’t work like that.
Steve: Sorry, Dave.
Matt: Dave, she’ll be okay, I promise. So, but we’re going to take the barcode of walking and map it over or bring it over to lifting weights, so now I can’t promise you’re going to do it. That’s up to you to decide to actually do it, right? But you will not feel the dread, you’ll feel at least positive about it and then you decide what you want to do about it. Is that fair?
Matt: Okay. Because ultimately NLP is not magic, like really. People sell it as magic. It’s not. It’s up to the person to do what they’re going to do.
Matt: Try this for a second. If you’re driving, do not do this, just to be clear because I’m going to ask her to close her eyes, okay? So, Mary, you do this, and if you’re sitting at home and you’re hanging out and you’re safe and in a happy place, feel free – not one of Steve’s happy places, but feel free to close your eyes…
Steve: I’ve got to get home fast! The show’s almost over.
Matt: So, Mary, close your eyes for a second, and again if you’re following along in a safe place, do it as well or listen to it and pause it, let’s do it later or whatever.
Rich: [Singing] It’s raining men… No, no, no, that’s what I was going to have her do with the dumbbells…
Matt: No. That’s a bad thing. Do not… So, Mary, and only Mary and not these other two jerks here. I want you to bring up an image of you lifting weights with your dumbbells. Got it?
Mary: Uh hum.
Matt: Shhhh. This is important. Okay. And, take that image and have it right up front in your mind’s eye and make sure you’re looking through your own eyes, so you’re looking through like you’re the one living in that right now. Got it?
Mary: Uh hum.
Matt: Okay. Good. Clear the screen for a second and bring up a new image. Bring up an image of you walking with your boyfriend feeling great. Breathe that in. [Sound of breathing in] Notice how good it feels to be walking outside and get a picture of that, and make sure now you step out of the picture so you could see yourself, like you’re looking at yourself on television.
Matt: Got it? Okay. Good. Take that image. This is really important to do it as fast as I do it. Take the image and bring it down to the lower right hand corner of the screen in your mind’s eye. So, a little, tiny picture of you walking along with Dave. Got it?
Mary: Got it.
Matt: And now, on the big screen right in front, bring back that picture of you and the dumbbells. So, what’s going to happen is the big picture in front is going to be the picture of you not really enjoying, right, the dumbbell thing.
Mary: Uh hum.
Matt: In the lower corner, you’re going to have a picture of you walking and enjoying yourself. Got it?
Mary: Got it.
Matt: Okay, cool. Now, I want you to do as you think about the dumbbells, think about working out, big picture right in front, on the count of three I’m going to say 1-2-3 go! When I say that you’re going to have the small picture explode big and bright over the old one and it’s going to take over everything. Make sure you keep thinking to yourself, I’m working out with dumbbells. Got it?
Matt: Okay. Working out with dumbbells, get rid of the old picture of dumbbells, bring up the new picture of walking outside in the corner, ready 1-2-3-Go! Explode it big and bright, say to yourself “working out with dumbbells”.
Mary: Working out with dumbbells.
Matt: Good. Open your eyes; close your eyes. Bring up the old picture again of the dumbbells, bring up the new picture small and dark in the corner, say to yourself “working out with dumbbells”.
Mary: Working out with dumbbells.
Matt: Going to the gym.
Mary: Going to the gym.
Matt: Lifting weights.
Mary: Lifting weights.
Matt: Right. 1-2-3-Go! Have them explode up. Open your eyes. close your eyes, bring up the old picture, bring up the new picture down in the corner…
Mary: Oh that’s so weird!
Matt: Ready – 1-2… Oh, it already did it, didn’t it?
Matt: Do it again. 1-2-3-Go! Open your eyes, close your eyes, bring up the old picture, bring up the new picture – we’re going to do it a little faster real quick, ready 1-2-3-Go! Open your eyes, close your eyes, bring up the old picture in front, bring up the new picture small in the corner, feeling good, say to yourself “working out with dumbbells.”
Mary: Working out with dumbbells.
Matt: Working out in the gym.
Mary: Working out in the gym.
Matt: Lifting some weights.
Mary: Lifting some weights.
Mary: Ah, that’s neat.
Matt: Lifting some weights.
Mary: Lifting some weights.
Matt: Lifting some weights.
Mary: Lifting some weights.
Matt: Good. And now open your eyes. And you can do that a few more times, but this is one of many different kind of recipe cards. What we’re doing is just we’re training new neuro-pathways and the neuro-pathway of when you imagine a picture of you walking and enjoying it, that produces positive feelings inside your body, right? You just smile, it makes you happy. So, we need to find out a way to map that or transfer it over to the activity that normally makes you frown.
Mary: So, it was weird. I think it was the third time you did it I literally had the real feeling from walking on the beach…
Matt: That’s right.
Mary: …pop up into my scenario of where I was lifting weights.
Matt: That’s exactly right.
Mary: It was weird.
Matt: Now, if you keep doing that – and here’s the coolest thing, now you translate it to real behavior. So, today’s Thursday as we’re recording this. Tomorrow or Saturday or Sunday – somewhere in the next three days if you choose to do this – it’s up to you – but you’ve got to cement that into real life now. So, you go to the gym and you may or may not want to initially at some point but you will feel more positive about it and at some point between deciding to go and actually lifting weights you will begin to feel the same as you felt when you’re walking…
Matt: …and all of a sudden you go – oh my gosh this is so much fun! And that will spiral up.
Rich: By the way, you’re looking great, Mary. You look as if you lost like 10 lbs.
Matt: And you feel like that too.
Matt: That’s some old school/new school NLP, but that’s just a fun way to shift something…
Mary: Yeah, it was cool.
Steve: Just so I’m clear here, would you kind of say that you might be Reinventing NLP? Would that be the…
Matt: That’s a great way to put it, Steve.
Steve: Alright, sweet. So, NLPspeaking.com, the best way for people to find out more information about you, Matt Brauning.
Matt: Yeah, cheap plug. Thank you so much.
Steve: Cheap plug. NLPspeaking.com. Very cool. Alright. For those who need one quick little final tip, what’s an exercise for something they can do next time maybe they meditate or next time they’re in their care or something like that, if they want to change their behavior, like if I want to stop smoking so much weed, which I don’t, but if I wanted hypothetically to stop smoking so much weed, like what’s one of the things I could do?
Matt: I mean, I could do what I just did with Mary…
Steve: The picture thingy.
Matt: …and you would end up not wanting to anymore, even though you feel like you want to, and then you’re like – damn it Matt! That’s fine. But could I say this real quick.
Steve: Yes, please.
Matt: So, we said Reinventing NLP, I want to say for anyone who actually knows NLP or has heard of it or something, sometimes there’s this real bad rap. I remember talking to your friend Alex Mandossian, right? He spoke at one of our events recently about a month ago in Orange County, and he had the funniest line. He was like, you know I’m so sick of so many of these NLP people. I feel like – because we’re all about intention and about effective communication and influence and… He’s like man I feel like I’m talking to an NLP person and they’re reloading as I’m talking, right? Like, he’s saying something and they’re just like in their head thinking about what pattern they’re going to do next. And I want to say like talk about a need for reinvention, today’s NLP what we’re using nowadays, 2016, on stage, right? When I run our live event or when we’re doing coaching or one-on-one work, is not what it used to be. We’re not trying to reload as you’re working. It’s about caring for people, understanding what people need and how to influence and communicate even more effectively.
Matt: So, there’s a ton of NLPspeaking.com about me using NLP on stage, me using NLP in communications.
Steve: Alright, Matt Brauning, very cool having you here in studio. Mary Goulet…
Mary: It was awesome!
Steve: …Rich Otey, I’m Steve Olsher. It’s been an awesome good time. I learn something new all the time. For those who are rating and reviewing and subscribing to the Podcast, we really do appreciate the love. We will talk to you next time on Reinvention Radio.
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